No resolutions for me this year. Instead, following the brilliant, touching, and witty examples of Tosha Silver in her book Outrageous Openness: Letting the Divine Take the Lead, I quit! That’s right! I QUIT!

I quit caring what other people think of me (That is a work in progress, mind you!). It’s none of my business anyway! I used to want everyone to like me. But now I realize that, if everyone likes me, I’m probably not being completely true to myself. If I am authentic, according to Tosha, I am bound to turn off a few people here and there. It makes sense. My happiness is no longer dependent upon others’ opinions of me. Soooo freeing! Wow!

So again, I quit! I QUIT! I quit needing to control everything. I quit trying to push and force things that will happen on their own if and when they are supposed to happen, with a LOT less effort, stress, and worrying. (For example, I have wanted to teach yoga but haven’t applied for any jobs for fear of not being very good, but the Universe came and got me! Back in October 2015, I was hired for 3 yoga jobs that I never applied for within 1 week of each other !)

What else have I quit, you ask? I quit thinking that I know what my capabilities and limitations are. (Translation: I am way more capable than I think I am and my only limitations are self-imposed. ) Life has proven me wrong soooo many times in this area (in a good way!), so I consider myself to be a “Happy Hypocrite”. I have held many strong beliefs and perceptions about myself and others which eventually fell to the wayside when I was shown another way. (Translation: they came crashing down in pieces when I was smacked in the face with a new, opposing experience!) When I am proven wrong, I now see it as a gift, as it means I have learned something or gained a new perspective. 

Life always SHOVES me past my beliefs and judgments. My lessons are swift and deep and have brought me to a place where I now understand/embody the paradoxical phrase, “The more I learn, the less I know.”. What that means to me, what experience has shown me (a recovering perfectionist!), is that there is no “right way” or “best way”, or even a “wrong way”. There really is only your journey and my journey. And if I am to be happy, I need to allow you to walk your journey, to feel your pain, to learn (or not learn) your own lessons. And just as my happiness is not dependent upon your opinions or where you choose to go on your journey, your happiness is not dependent upon how and where I go on mine.

Finally, I quit needing to know(Also a toughie!!!). The amount of uncertainty in my life right now would have sent me into a tailspin of fear in the past, but I know on a very deep level that I am exactly where I am supposed to be and am going exactly where I am supposed to go (wherever that may be, LOL). When I am open to experience in this way, what comes along is always far greater than anything I could have ever imagined.

Please don’t misunderstand my words here. When I say, “I quit,” it does not mean that I am giving up. Not by any means. What I really mean is that I surrender. With the deepest of trust, I surrender to a force much greater than myself and follow the signs that I receive. And I receive A LOT of signs, sometimes very humorous ones! (Perhaps I will share in future posts.)

So, as we begin this new year, instead of resolutions, I begin by setting the simple intention:

Let what needs to go, go and let what needs to come into my life, come into my life.

Thank You Word Drawn On The Beach SandHow are you starting your new year? What do you quit in 2016??

Please feel free to share. I would love to hear from you!

In gratitude,

Debbie Young
Owner of Soul Shed Wellness